King of Swords, Romantic Tarot

Yesterday's last meaning:
It's better to be alone than entertaining dysfunctional relationships, but it's even better to find functional ones :)

But for some of us, that isn't an easy task! 

***

Maybe you've always had a feeling that your words doesn't matter.

Like they've been neglected, ignored, diminished and/or misconstrued, and just fall ... broken to the ground.
Like neither your thoughts, perspectives nor words matter - and deep down inside, you early on came to the conclusion that YOU don't matter.
You came to vacillate between attacking and defending yourself, 'to make yourself heard', in relationships, to the point of exhaustion.
But you were too tired to even sit down.
Out of self-preservation you ended up just standing there, trying to 'look composed'.
You did not know what else to do.

Maybe you got tired of the whole thing.
Of feeling defensive and/or aggressive. Of never finding 'your crowd'. Of 'keeping it together'. Of playing mind games.
Maybe you ended up shying away from all relationships.
It just 'hurts too much'. It's 'not worth it'.

***

The good news: there's nothing wrong with you!
Most probably, your basic needs of feeling seen and heard weren't met in your childhood. 
(caregivers likely unaware of nervous system development and emotional regulation)
#TraumaResponse #BiologyOfTrauma

More good news: it's 'repairable'
#SomaticExperiencing #SelfRegulation #EmotionalAwareness #Attunement 
#ReverseEngineering

Lets turn this ship around - reverse it :)
#TraumaAwareness #TraumaHealing
Lets not 'follow the unconscious crowd' and head full steam towards the iceberg!