Ten of Cups, Infinity Tarot
We're on a roll here - C10 two days in a row!
It's not that everything feels like roses and sunshine, but that we're finding what's truly important and success for ourselves.
I'm certainly not the one dancing around on pink clouds at the moment :D
The heat stroke last Monday was the drop that put my system over the edge (after weeks of fight and flight energies filling it up), out of my window of tolerance, and into a massive #FreezeResponse , where it parked.
So, success for me, now, is accepting where I am. Accepting that my body know not what else to do. It's programmed to shut down when overwhelmed beyond manageable. From the very beginning of my life, from childhood trauma (which is NOT an event, but an experience #AimieAipigian ).
No matter how uncomfortable, it's a perfectly understandable response - not a disorder.
A continuation from the most recent days - forget how it looks from the outside. That it looks like you're 'doing nothing', 'getting nothing done' - as the most important thing is to listen to and be with your body right now. Find and heal the root causes.
That's certainly not 'doing nothing', which everyone on the healing journey can attest to!
Maybe you're like me, and have very few people on this kind of journey in your life, with little or no understanding in these 'soft matters'. It might make it extra challenging. Putting your already stressed or frozen system under extra press, having to decide, put up and manage boundaries, and 'handle the reactions of the unaware'.
Being in freeze mode, it's not the easiest thing in the world to act and stay in compassion for other people's trauma responses!
But it seems as the universe is patting our backs for how we're navigating stuff, and telling us; 'keep up the good work!'
"Harmony and happiness derive from a simple inner fullness that is not rational!"
It doesn't matter if others understand our choices. Hey, it doesn't matter if WE understand fully either!
Neither the soul or the body care about our 'story/narrative', but only that we listen to their experiences and needs.
There's an order to the experienced chaos!
Theme: "managing the ordered chaos of the universe"