Page of Swords + Queen of Cups, Hidden Realm + Fairy Tale

Releasing the belief that dreaming, softness and compassion has to be trained!

Usually we see a young man in the Page of Swords but here there's a woman.
I read about how her arms 'get shaky when she trains for too long'.

Not that it is categorically wrong for women to take up fiercer practices, but now - 44 years later - I know how unfitting it is for me!!
I trained very hard to "become a strong person", but all that training mostly made me rigid, harsh and closed off.
I learned how important it is to 'take care of yourself and earn a living', which includes 'fending people off' too. In essence, all very masculine things and attributes.

It is not that I have realized this TODAY. It dawned on me many years ago how un-feminine I've lived my life.
To no fault of my own. I did not know or learn about any other way.
So in that sense, nothing is wrong about how I have lived my life - this was exactly the path I was meant to walk.

I begun the 'shift' way back in 2012, but it has been a 'very slow process'.
Or, a deep and diligent study in all the mechanisms and workings "behind the scenes" (the Hidden Realms)
And now at last everything begins to 'come together'.
As it happens, ON THE DAY when my #SolarArc #Chiron shifts to Cancer after 30 years in curious Gemini!!

On the day when I suddenly realize that 'coming back into femininity' isn't something I have to TRAIN, but only let to come out! As I've never "learned the feminine practices" but VERY early was thrown into the masculine world I've just had the belief that I have to "re-train". LEARN to be feminine just like I learned to be masculine - through hard work.

But like the queen I just have to 'raise my gaze'. Look away from all that thinking. And just BE.
Having a feminine essence I have it all within me, no matter how long ago it was embodied - even if it never has been embodied.
It will feel somewhat foreign, maybe for quite some time - but it is nothing that has to be TRAINED!
It only has to be 'allowed to flower'.

#HiddenRealmTarot
#FairyTaleTarot