Five of Cups, Fantôme Tarot

Self-forgiveness.

Sometimes we do shit we regret.
Sometimes we even (subconsciously) know we will regret the shit before we do it - and yet we go through with it.
Were dealing with something often called 'self-sabotage'.

"How could we be so stupid??"

No, we weren't stupid, we were unconscious.
Driven by a dysregulated nervous system.
Caught in our South Node story #EvolutionaryAstrology
Unconsciously seeking 'the familiar' or 'normal' - whether healthy or not (often not)
Maybe after a period of feeling (too) good #UpperLimitProblem

If our familiar is drama - we invite it or create it.
If our familiar is 'messing up' - we mess up.
If our familiar is 'being a failure' - we fail, ourselves or someone else.
If our familiar is 'not being worthy' - we do something shitty.

Resulting in an intense feeling of failure, regret or something resembling betrayal.

The compassionate move here is to embrace ourselves (or our friend) in the pain - because all the shame is merely covered up pain, needing to be acknowledged.
It's imperative to forgive ourselves for (maybe 'once again') doing that familiar thing that 'puts us in trouble' - all the while waking up to the 'true story' and driving force behind it.

No point in beating ourselves up.
What's done is done - even if it's done before and maybe will be done again.
Hardwired patterns may take many 'failures' to break.
The only way is through - with awareness, courage and determination.
And maybe a supporting friend by our side.

#FantômeTarot