In the Moment 8

Earlier moments.


"I am approaching this theme in a hundred ways, because I know most of us have hundred levels of resistance, denial, or avoidance, ..."

...

"I call contemplation the tree of life, as compared to the other tree "in the center of the garden" of Eden, "the tree of the knowledge of good and evil" (Genesis 2:9), because these two serve as ideal metaphors for the two minds. The tree of the knowledge of good and evil represents "either-or" dualism, which we are strictly warned against, end even told not to eat."

"It is not the tree of life, but only the tree of "this or that"."

...

"Dualistic people use knowledge, even religious knowledge, for the purpose of ego enchantment, shaming, and the control of others and themselves, for it works very well in that way"

"Non-dual people use knowledge for the transformation of persons and structures, but most especially to change themselves and to see reality with a new eye and heart. They hold and "suffer" the conflicts of life instead of passing them on or projecting them elsewhere. 

They do not get rid of life's pain until they learn its necessary lessons"

"...we are now told that the atoms we breathe are physically the same as the stardust from the original Big Bang.
Oneness is no longer merely a vague mystical notion, but a scientific fact."

"I'm not writing this book to change anybody's beliefs, doctrines, dogmas, or moralities. I am hoping to change the mind by which you understand those very things."

"The ego and the false self hate change more than anything else in the world, and the mind is their primary control tower."

"One you accept ongoing change as a central program for yourself, you tend to continue growing throughout all of your life."

~ The Naked Now: Learning to See As the Mystics See, Richard Rohr ~

20190217


"The evolutionary biologist Robin Dunbar once said, "What sets us apart is a life in the mind, the ability to imagine." As it turns out, however, some people cannot.

You're saying what?!

"To aphantasiacs, this is incomprehensible and the ability to imagine is just absurd." (scienceabc.com)

_______

I donĀ“t sign under "neurological defect" written on that page though.
I don't feel broken.

Annoyed, yes.
Broken (defect), no.

Sure. I have always really, (really, really, really) wanted to have sparkling imagination and fun fantasies - but I just... don't. (It would certainly have helped my during my school years - I S*U*C*K*E*D at all kinds of writing assignments, as they required at least an ounce of fantasy)
       And I really wan't to get on the active-imagination-train a'la CG Jung.
Or hop on the active-dreaming-ship a'la Robert Moss.

But I don't have a ticket for those rides.
I'm not "tall enough" for those carousels.

But why should we be the same and alike?

________ 

I neither feel blocked, nor defect.
I feel I have other capabilities instead. Like a blind person develops other functions more.
Until proven otherwise I'm convinced that I have been given a configuration suited my fated assignment. The contract my soul has signed with the universe. The responsibilities I am given by nature to fulfil, "or else".
For that I probably (apparently) don't need imagination.

Sure - it would be fun (I think) with imagination - but, apparently, in my case, unnecessary.
I don't have any haunting dreams telling me something is blocked, and - honestly - I don't feel that anything is missing. 

My ego think its sucks.
But I don't feel that there's something wrong.

Analogously with how I perceive my complex, peculiar, massive anxiety. 
My ego highly disapproves with it - but, again, no hunting scary recurring dreams (as if there is something I have blocked or resist facing), but (in my deep inner core) I can't feel that it is a defect either.

But, the million dollar question:

What the hell am I configured for?!

Having two uteruses - not wanting to have children - on top of it, like frosting on the cake.

It's a thinker... (and apparently it's literately meant for me to THINK it out !!! )

For The Universe to know - for me to find out.

_____

"Neuroimaging has shown that mental imagery, although strongly associated with the left temporal lobe, requires the use of large networks of brain pathways. This means that aphantasia could potentially occur in different ways in different individuals.

I do have images in my dreams, and can recall things seen to some extent, but the images are generally not especially sharp, and are over-weighted by a combination of feelings, thoughts, words and "knowing what it looks like" rather than see it. 

"Interestingly, an aphantasic may have a visual memory which means they may be able to describe in detail about how things looked - the cat had blue eyes, the umbrella was pink and matched the skirt - even though they cannot see these very images in their mind's eye." (magneticmemorymethod.com)

"For some people, the visual mind is a blank canvas. Being asked to think of the ocean or a recent vacation or the face of a loved one conjures up nothing. There is no "mind's eye". No pictorial imagination. Just darkness.
     In recent years, scientists have dubbed the term 'aphantasia' - the absence of fantasy.

"If you tell me to imagine a beach, I ruminate on the 'concept' of a beach," he explained. "I know there's sand. I know there's water. I know there's a sun, maybe a lifeguard. I know facts about beaches. I know a beach when I see it, and I can do verbal gymnastics with the word itself."" (news.com.au)

____

I woke up in the middle of the night, and as I felt a little bit too awake to go back to sleep immediately so I quickly screened through my Facebook, and "coincidentally" stumbled upon the word Aphantasia.

Nature has so many escapades and aces up it's sleeves!

What if we would listen, learn, feel, sense - accept and adjust accordingly - instead of trying to cure, correct and control?

20190202